Soaring in the sky

I want to soar in the deep blue sky. Careless and Free. But is it true eagles are careless and free?

Intro to Econs

And so i am stuck in the econs lecture. where i dont know anything at all. wat the fuck right. and the prof is gonna start talking.

and i just finished a fucked up quiz. i am so dead.

i want to love econs. but its getting hard for me

In SMU doing LTB

I read alvin's blog. read jazzy's blog, read sher's blog. different.

i wonder if all of our life is the same. i wonder what is kendrick's life like. he is smart. sometimes, i feel very stress to be a scholar. i dont think that i am stupid. but i am not super duper smart. i dont read papers. i am not updated in stuff. i dont think like them. sometimes, i feel alienated. i know i am smart to a certain extent. but to a certain extent. i wonder what they see in me to become a scholar. WORK HARD. whatever i lack, i will get it back. i want my summa. i wish, i hope, i will.

leadership is something i feel i have. i think i have. however, i am starting to feel otherwise. so many ppl are better than me.

i dont fit into SMU. i dont really fit anyway. people listen to english songs. i love chinese songs. i love hokkien songs. i love canto songs. i love to sing kbox. people here are so different. i dont feel at home. i am not going to bluff myself again that i feel totally at home with odac. there are some ppl that i cannot get along with. i am a perfectionist and i hope for the best. i want to be the best. and i really want to have super high eq. but i have to admit that my eq is not as good as i want it to. i am brash(some of my frens say). or tactless?? is it good to be too straight forward? how will i survive in society?

i have my own sorts of problems. they are by no means small to me. no one can understand and no one can really help.

i love my friends. they are my laughter, they are my life. they are the one that make my day. by myself, i will nvr live for one day. of cos family is better than friends. i will be there when they need me. promise.